Great turn of event?!
Alone on Wednesday, August 5, 2009
So ... I JUST found out that I've won Queenie's Mascara giveaway and it's freaking CRAZY. So random and unexpected! O_0 Never thought I would win, and I guess... good things come when you're least expecting it? -.- or something along that line... I .. had a laugh-attack when I told Colin the news. xD should buy me a lottery ticket! who knows! I think I'll do a review on youtube as thanks! =o
Anyways... It's been a month since my last rant... knowing that people will check out my blog from Queenie's blog makes me shudder... As much as I can disclose about my real identity to keep me hidden, some noob will eventually figure it out... and especially Colin bb. AND I used my most frequently used email... I wondered if Blogspot was a good idea. I wanted to try it because I use gmail and it's bothersome trying to remember even MORE account log-ins.
My days have been improving. Less stressed and MORE FREE TIME! =D
I'm officially OFF FROM WORK in two more days. D: I'm getting 2 weeks ( more like 8 working days) before school starts again. And oh man, does school suck. I can't freaking get financial aid people on the line to find out my status! Crazy! I wonder if it's the right choice to stay in my area.
On that note about area, I REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY want to move. Seriously. I despise this neighborhood so much. I can't even wear summer clothes without the thought of some creepy old dudes appearing from somewhere and showing me his ****. WORST experienceS in my LIFE. I seriously can't wait till I can drive. My dad probably doesn't know about it or he would just think/say I go out too much yadda yadda. License. Here I (try to) GO!
I've gotten paid for the last time for my summer intern job! =D It was quite boring.. more like free-money but I'm ABSOLUTELY saving it for books in the fall. :( IF my financial aid stuff doesn't come through. Ah, I'm in a bind! About whether to get the BOGOF at CT on these fobby looking bags. I can only find ONE bag I like and most likely will use for school. I hope the place doesn't close down before I decide! Eek! I was thinking to get any cute ones... and try to resell it off on soompi.
Yvonne is coming back from CHINA tomorrow. I was going to see her, but I guess they wouldn't have enough space for me. She trusts/likes/hangs out with Jill more even though I'm a block away? I thought Yvonne was my true bff, but she seems to be neglecting me .. probably because I'm not always happy go lucky like Jill or that I don't know enough chinese. I want a bff... even though I know it doesn't last forever. Jill is cute but I don't think we think alike. She has waaaay different tastes and only care for chinese things. Whereas I am a Japanese-Korean whore. :(
It's kinda lonely knowing I had force Alice to let go. We clicked. I was just selfish thinking I had her to always fall back on. I had enough of being a guardian and wanting to be cared for. Boy, was I immature. Now it's too late. She's gone and I'm at loss.
I want to reach out
I want to tell someone they're awesome
I want to share my stories
I want to tell them how happy I am
I want to tell them how beautiful they look in that shirt
But I have noone to tell it too.
I'm just a self-centered, pathetic loser who's afraid of jumping in the pond because I don't want to get hurt hitting rock bottom.
<3 that one Asian girl
Little Miss Queenie's giveaway~
Alone on Tuesday, August 4, 2009
MAYBELLINE PULSE PERFECTION!
Hurrah a great chance to try it out (that is IF I win.)
:(
Check out Queenie's bloggg~ (That I have been stalking for a while... xD)
Hapy 4th of July!~
Alone on Saturday, July 4, 2009
Yes it's Fourth of July here in America. Yet, I'm at home blogging. Why?
That's a very good question that I do not have an answer to. Let's just say, I got lazy and I brought this on myself. I will start out with what happen last couple of days.
The 9-1-1 incident. I am THIS close to posting that on http://fml.com but I'll stop myself here. I think it was just a day ago, Colin wasn't feeling quite well, so I gave him a call at around 1AM after my steamy-hot shower. Biggest mistake ever was that I used the home phone to dial. I didn't want to waste any more of my minutes because I don't have unlimited minutes; anyways, it was 9-1-x I could've sworn i pressed the 1 only ONE time. AND I hanged up before it even reached there (or so I assumed) and it WAS kinda dark. So I went ahead and dialed Colin's number right away telling him what had happened and asked him if he was feeling any better. We heard 2 beeps on our line. Colin reassured me it was okay. Then my sister woke up and saw me on the phone. She immediately picked up and eavesdropped from the phone in our kitchen. I asked Colin to wait a bit, but that dumbass kept saying "Hello, hello." Swear to god. Learn to follow directions? That's why I hate talking on the phone, people can't comprehend for shit and I don't find phone chatting very convienent. Then, like about 5 minutes after, 2 police cars came knocking on our door. I believe they rung both doorbells, of our appartment and the people below us, in addition to banging on the door un-gently with her knuckles. I rushed down imediately scared SHITLESS. I explained to the officers and one of them asked for my name and phone number (I believe for the record so they will probably think I'm prank calling 911.) but WOW, that was SO shocking how fast the call reached them. I felt really bad because maybe someone was in some REAL trouble and they dispatched 2 cars here instead of somewhere else. Anyways, dad was CRAZY mad. He started screaming some shit but I guess both my parents were to tired to say anything. Then, my sister started talking shit like I can't make mistake or something. She thought I was prank calling 911? What a joke. I can't stand her attitudes and dumbass thinking. Anyways, the only ones who were cool with it were my brothers. Thank god, wish I had another brother instead of this dumbass sister. I'd give her away/trade her anyday NOW. Seriously, me having a sister is probably worse than NOT having one at all. But then, i'm just unlucky that SHE's my sister and DAD's my dad, you know?
So, The next day I was hopelessly scared. I kept rethinking of the scenario and frightened myself. But luckily, my parents were cool and my mom talked to me.
Hmmm, I need to get some new bras, sport bras aren't very usefull and my real bras are ripped. :\ FML. TARGET/WALMART NOWWWSS T_T.
Anyways, yesterday I talked to Colin. I was scared and I guess he was trying to comfort me? But it wasn't working. He wasn't feeling well himself and I was being selfish again. I don't know what happened I snapped and he got mad, yet AGAIN. I swear this relationship isn't working out. As much as I want it to, I don't think we're meant to be for each other. He's overly sensitive and I just don't love him the way he does me. On that note, I never really fell in LOVE yet. Maybe I did at first with Ricky? (an ex) but it was soon ended in heartbreak. I was the one breaking it :D Not to be an asshole, but he was a jerk. Boy, was I blind. Ricky didn't cheat on me or anything, it's just he has never done anything for me to make me feel loved. It was just intimacy and "getting laid" was what I felt he wanted. (Thanks alot skater boy Simon.) Oh man, I'm going to totally confuse myself with all these names =_= I need a note-to-self thing. AH, why do I keep going off-topic >_< WTH FUCKING BLOGGER SO FUCKING RETARDED. FUCK
Nobody's talkin' 'cause talkin' just turns into screamin'
And now it's I'm yellin' over her, she yellin' over me
All that means is neither of us is listening
And what's even worse?
That we don't even remember why we're fighting
So both of us are mad for
Nothing, fighting for
Nothing, crying for nothing
But we won't let it go for
Nothing, no not for
Nothing, this should be
Nothing to a love like what we got
Yup, Just like that. That's why I'm here on Fourth of July wishing that I had done something better. I was going to go running to clear my head today (wish I should have) but I woke up later than I had anticipated and ended up not going... fml. I'm so stupid and lazy. I'm gonna be fat and dumb the rest of my life T_T. Seriously.
Oh man, I shouldn't have attempted to make Jasmine Milk Tea at home... It wasn't bad. It was just I'm lactose intolerant T_T and I'm suppose to go out with my homies tomorrow too... FML AGAIN. UGH
<3
that one Asian girl
Good morrow!?
Alone on Thursday, July 2, 2009
I am officially moving my life onto this blog as of July 02, 2009 3:11PM (aka now.) I will keep myself anonymous as well as all characters in my life. I am still debating whether or not to share slices of my life to the vast kingdom of Tenretni. Maybe in the near future...
So, as the first excerpt into my blog, I shall start with my day up until now.
This morning, I failed to wake up because I was up reading the couple chapters of Crimson Hero from my monthly subscription to Shojo-Beat magazine; which I haven't touched since the April issue. (Maybe not completely true ... but I don't think bathroom reading accounts for THAT much.) But anyways, it took me by complete surprised how AWESOME Crimson Hero was. Yep. It was like totally dramatic, fun, and breath-taking. I would go dig for volumes and download like ALL OF IT ... but I'm not that crazy nor do I have the time. I NEVER HAVE TIME FOR ANYTHING ANYMORE- AHHH! Work has occupied most of my time, when I'm not at work, I would be too tired to do anything. That includes hanging out with my bee eff - I will refer to him as Colin. I DO get weekends off, which is a really good thing - but then since all my plans get pushed back so everything is always last minute for me. I would soooo make filming my priority but Melaniii is busy with her life as well. I hope RAWRmen doesn't die. Seriously. I would try and do vlog and TRY to be funny, but I have no talent/skills/looks/..speech?
Anyways, I guess I can rant to Eddie for now. My NEW rant buddy! =D except, he doesn't complain much. He said that he would rather solve problems himself - and always keeping things to himself. I've been trying to get him to talk but ... not quite working. (NOTE TO SELF: Eddie owes me quickly's - any $4 drink <3). And he had conflicts with Colin in the past, I don't want to get into that now. It's overly dramatic and they're all in the past. No point bringing that up now.
I need my computer back.
Badly.
Like,
NOW.
Using a temporary computer REALLY sucks. I can't decide whether to add stuff on here (like music and bookmarks) or transfer everytime I updated this. I finally got windows live messenger AND aim. I really really really really dislike meebo.com. Sorry meebo, I know I've used you for a while :( but you REALLY suck. Seriously. Can't stand being disconnected and such. -_-
Hmmm, I was suppose to talk about my day wasn't I?~
LOL
Okay, so I went to Laney College in the afternoon because I failed to wake up in the morning... And I had to wait like 35mins to talk to the darn counselor. She was quite USELESS. and I don't like Laney at all. Everyone's so busy and I can't get a friendly help at all. UGH WHERE ARE MY HOMIES WHEN I NEED THEM!? I really need someone to take classes with. Being alone SUCKS >_< all my HS homies are going different paths. I can't even get in touch with Jessica & Jamie, the twins. The only people I even talk to about my life are Colin and Eddie. -_- I DO hang out with Jill but, like, she's preoccupied with Melaniii and I don't want to disclose too much information or it SPREADS- LIKE LICE! (I'm not sure)
Talking about lice, I've recently dyed my hair. It's BROWN. (Yah typical Asian girl?) I don't really like my hair -_- I shouldn't layered it so many times. It's like FLAT and CHOPPY >_< Also, GIRLS: DON'T trim your own bangs if you don't know HOW. I mean, mine looked okay when i trimmed it, but it's like THICK and choppy now TAT. Big mistake.
I feel like I over-ranted for the first blog and scare anyone that would happen to stop by? I don't think I will share my blog to anyone that knows me TOO well.
I guess that's it for now. I will try to come back when something happens or something (Eddie hated when I say that for some reason. He knows he's JUST my RANT partner.)
PS. THERE ISN'T A NUMBER KEYPAD ON HERE! DANGGG IT! >_<
<3
that one asian girl